Koaster

Note: this story was written in a little notebook in the back of my mom’s truck while we were driving across
the country one summer. For this reason, it is not a GOOD story. I don’t know if it’s BAD or not, but I
would not blame you one bit if you decided to flame me because of this...

At first, Scully had planned to ignore the telephone, which had started to ring as soon as she settled down at
the other side of the living room with her battered copy of Breakfast at Tiffany's. But the caller stayed on
the phone until the answering machine turned on. "Scully, it's me. . . I know you're there, answer the phone.
. . I'm not putting this phone down until you answer me, Scully. . ." It was Mulder. Sighing, Scully dropped
her book on the sofa and leaned over to pick up the receiver. "What," she said.
	"Hi!" Mulder greeted her brightly. "You're not doing anything today, are you?"
	"Mulder, you know I never do anything on Saturdays. . ."
	"Yeah, that's how I knew you were there."
	"So then why'd you ask me?"
	"I. . . never mind. Uh, listen, I just entered a radio contest and won two free tickets to Koaster
Kingdom."
	"And you're asking me if I want to go with you." 
	"Yeah, I'll pick you up at one-thirty."
	"What? Wait, Mulder. . ."
	"Bring some anti-acid tablets if you're prone to motion sickness." He hung up.

	"I hope you brought a lot of money," Mulder said as Scully slid into the passenger seat. "I hear the
food's pretty expensive here."
	"Don't worry, I'm sure I could just flash my badge and scare the vendors in to giving me a free hot
dog."
	Mulder looked at her thoughtfully. "You know, that's not a bad idea. Maybe if we like it, we could
get back in free tomorrow if we say we're with the FBI and on a manhunt."
	Scully stared back at him, not liking the way he used the word 'we'. "I was kidding," she said.
	After a twenty-minute drive, they arrived at the front gate. They had to go by a small, yellow booth
where a teenager was selling parking tickets. "Ten dollars," she said as she smacked her gum, sounding very
bored. Mulder sighed and dug around in his wallet until he found an old, crumpled ten-dollar bill. She took it
and carelessly tossed a white paper ticket at him. He miraculously managed to catch it before it floated down
to the mudpuddle beside the car.
	"Ten dollars for a parking ticket?" Scully exclaimed as they drove around the parking lot. "That's
outrageous!"
	"Well, it takes a lot of money to maintain a place like this," Mulder said defensively. After a while,
he finally found a parking space near the back of the lot. He and Scully got out and prepared for the long
journey to the real entrance to the park. As they started their trek across the long stretch of pavement,
something plopped down on Scully's head. At first, she thought it was a raindrop and automatically reached
up to brush it away. When she looked at her hand, she saw that it was covered in a dark yellowish goo.
"Aughh! Mulder, what is this?" Mulder looked at her and burst into a fit of uncontrollable laughter. "What is
it? What's on me, Mulder?"
	"It's. . . it's. . . bird. . ." that last word gave it away. 
	"Oh, no. . ." Scully self-consciously covered her hair with one hand as she ran towards the ticket
booth. "I have a free pass, can I go on through?" she asked as she dug the ticket out of her pocket with her
free hand. She was glad Mulder had given it to her in the car. The ticket-taker, another bored teenager,
seemed a little confused, but let her by. Still keeping a protective hand over her hair to hide the bird-mess,
Scully ran towards the nearest building which, luckily, turned out to be a bathroom. She pushed past the
women at the sink and stuck her head under the faucet. "Um, sorry," she said after it was all washed out.
She gave the lady standing next to her an embarrassed smile. "I had a little accident. . ." the lady smiled back
at her knowingly.
	Mulder was waiting for Scully outside. "Oh, did you get it out?" he asked innocently, as if he didn't
know what she had just been doing.
	"Mulder," she replied, "I'm going to buy a hat."
	"Bad idea. You don't look good in hats."
	"I look even worse in bird sh*t," she short back. Mulder handed her a map of the park, which he
had picked up on his more civilized way to the bath house. Scully's eyebrow's went up as she looked over it,
searching for the nearest hat-stand. "They misspelled 'coaster,'" she remarked, noticing that, like 'Kingdom,'
it started with a 'K' on the map.
	"Oh, they're just trying to be cute. Come on, it looks like there's a hat place down that way." As
they made their way through the crowded place, Mulder looked around to see if there was anything that
looked interesting. "Hey, look at that, Scully," he said, pointing towards a large, stone building. "It's the
Ghoster Coaster."
	"I'm glad they didn't spill 'coaster' with a 'G' this time," she replied hastily. "Let's go."
	"No, wait, there's hardly any line at all, plus it's inside! Please, let's ride it!" he begged like a little
nine-year-old kid. Scully sighed. "Okay, fine-- but after that, we go straight to the hat-stand."
	The 'hardly any line at all' turned out to be longer than Mulder had expected. After about twenty
minuets, they finally entered the building. Several more bored teenagers ushered them into a car. Suddenly, a
large bar came crashing down on their shoulders. "Owwww!" they yelled simultaneously. One of their ushers
tugged at the bar to make sure it was secure. Then, before they knew what was happening, they were
whisked away into the darkness.
	"Uh, Mulder?" Scully said as the ride began.
	"Yeah?"
	"This is the kind of safety restraint they put on roller coasters that go upside-down, right?" Scully
was getting a little nervous.
	"Yeah. . ."
	The car suddenly started going very, very fast.
	"AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

	"I'm glad I brought those anti-acid tablets," Scully groaned after they got off the Ghoster Coaster.
They stumbled along the crowded street, holding their stomachs, until they got to the hat stand. There were
three choices: a visor that had to top, leaving your head free for birds to use as target practice; a had shaped
like a chicken, and a tall, felt top had with an alien face on top. "Are you sure you want a hat?" Mulder
asked her."
	"Yes, she said, picking up the chicken hat and studying the price tag. "Thirty dollars! I could make
something that looked better for less!"
	"I'll pay for it," Mulder said.
	"Really?" Scully was taken by surprise by the kind, once-in-a-lifetime offer. It's not every day that
your partner offers to buy you a chicken-hat, she thought.
	"Sure. But you have to get the alien hat."
	"Alright. . ."
	"And wear it. All day."
	She looked at it again and winced. It was so. . . tacky. But she wouldn't feel really safe until she had
a hat. "Okay."
	Delighted, Mulder took it up to the counter and paid for it, then came back to where Scully was
standing, trying on the visors, and plopped it down on her head. She sighed and adjusted it. "Where to
next?" she wondered out loud.
	"The Tornado Loop-De-Looop," Mulder replied after looking at the map.
	"The what?"
	"Tor-na-do-loop-de-loop," he said again. "Right over here." He dragged her by the hand over to
the end of the line. 
	"Mulder!" Scully sighed. "This is one of those that goes upside-down again. Come on, let's ride
something else. Look at this line. . .!" But she found that, to her amazement, the line moved fairly quickly. In
less that five minutes, they were standing in line for the end car.
	"Why do we have to ride this one?" Scully whined. "The line here is so long." 
	Mulder pursed his lips as he surveyed the scene. "You're right," he said at last.
	"Good. Let's get it the middle. That's where the line is shortest." And you don't get slung around as
much, she added silently, because she knew that if she said it out loud it would make the middle all the more
unappealing to her partner. She pulled him over to one of the little stalls. This one was nearly empty, except
for two chattery little girls. Suddenly, the cars came roaring in and the people got out. The little girls, still
chattering, hopped into the empty seats. There were five in each row though, so Mulder and Scully sat in the
first two, leaving a protective space between them and the chatterboxes. One of the operators (you guessed
it-- a bored teenager) came over to them. "Hey, you're gonna hafta, like, spread out your weight, y'know,
you little chicks on the outside, you big chick and you dude there on the inside, uh. . ."
	The two girls, looking a bit distressed at having to sit five whole seats away from each other,
obeyed the operator with only a bit of grumbling. Mulder and Scully, however, were not pleased. For the
last few seconds before the ride started, the two girls leaned over them and continued their gossip:
	"Ohmigod did you see what Donald was wearing?"
	"Yeah, Jill said his mom picked it out for him."
	"No duh? Like anyone that cute could have such awful taste!"
	"Hey, did Nicole go to the dance with anyone?"
	"Yeah, with Mick."
	"Mick? Ohmigod, he is such a geek! You know what?"
	"What?" They leaned even farther and one girl whispered something into the other's ear. 
	"AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" she shrieked. "No way!"
	"Yes, way!"
	"AHHHHHHHHH!" Fortunately, at that moment, the cars started to pull out of the track and the
girls shut up for a half second to gasp and claw at each other out of fear and excitement. Then they went on
with their endless talking. The same thing happened on the first two loops, but on the third loop, the cars
suddenly stopped. The girls, completely unphased, continued talking.
	"Mulder, this is impossible!" Scully exclaimed.
	"I know what you mean," he said, leaning his head up to look down. "Hi!" he called to the people
below.
	"No. I mean it's scientifically impossible. The laws of physics state that it is impossible for this to
happen unless of course the cars were being suspended, which they're not. "
	"What? Who's Donald?"
	"That wasn't me, that was her!" an exasperated Scully shouted, pointing at the girl beside her.
	"I'm Bethany!" she shrieked in Mulder's ear as she leaned across Scully's lap.
	"I'm Bethany, I'm Bethany, you're cute!!"
	Mulder ignored her. "What? Where were you, Scully?"
	"The cars aren't being held up by anything that I know of. They actually rely completely on the laws
of physics to operate these things. This position is virtually impossible."
	"What do you mean? . . . Oh, I see. Well maybe they equalized the weight too much."
	"What?"
	For the next ten minuets they tried to explain to each other the possibilities. Suddenly, the cars
started moving again, and they were too busy screaming to think about it.

	"Let me have that map," Scully said as they walked down the 'Exit' line from the roller coaster.
Mulder dug around in his pocket and gave her the crumpled pamphlet. "Here. Right here." Scully pointed to
a point on the map. "We're going to see a show, and then get a snack. I'm starving." She led the way through
the rest of the line, then down a little street lined with people and midway stalls for games. As they walked,
Scully felt a pounding on her back. She turned around and saw a huge, stuffed bear falling towards her.
"Mulder, watch out!" she cried, pushing him out of the way. They stumbled over to the side of the road and
watcehd the bear continue to wobble down the walkway. As they stood gawking, they saw that underneath
the bear was a very tiny little girl with floppy, yellow pigtails and a frilly white dress. She poked her head out
from under the bear and said, "Where's Mommy?"
	"Uh. . . I dunno," Mulder stammered, eager to get going. 
	"Mulder, wait." Scully walked over to the little girl. "Did you get lost?" she asked her. The girl
nodded. "Where did you last see your mommy?"
	"After I got my bear."
	"Where did you get it?"
	"Over there." The girl slung the bear over at one of the games.
	"How long have you. . . has she been missing?" Scully asked, carefully wording her question.
	"A couple'a minutes."
	"Well, shes' probably looking for you. Why don't you come with us and see if you can find her?
We're going over there." The girl nodded again, adjusted her huge bear on her shoulders, and followed the
agents down the street.
	"Would you like me to hold your bear for you?" Mulder asked cautiously.
	"No!" she yelled. Then she turned all smiles. "Do you have any children, mister?"
	"No. I'm not even married."
	"Then. . . who's that?" she asked with a gleam in her eye, indicating Scully with her bear.
	Scully rolled her eyes. "That's my friend," Mulder sighed.
	"Your girlfriend?" the girl squealed.
	"No, we just work together."
	"Ohhhhhh." As they continued walking, they found no sign of her mother.
	"We could hand her over to one of the park security gards," Mulder suggeted.
	"That's a good idea." Scully bent down so that she was at eye level with the girl. "What's your
name?"
	"Suzie," she replied from underneath the great bulk of fuzz and stuffing.
	"Okay, Suzie. See that man over there?" she pointed to a gaurd standing by the entrance to the
show. "He's going to find your mommy for you. Come on." She and Mulder led Suzie over to the man. "I
have a lost child," she announced.
	"Mm-hmm. . . and her name is. . .?"
	"Suzie."
	"And your name. . .?"
	"Dana Scully."
	"Suzie Scully. I like that name." He looked down at Suzie. "You got a cute kid. How old are you,
kid?"
	"I'm four!" Suzie cried before Scully could say anything.
	"Four! Well, well, she's pretty tall for her age, ain't she? Must take after her father." He gave a very
confused Mulder a slap on the back.
	"But as far as looks, I'd have to say she definately takes after you, Mrs. Scully."
	"Um, she's not mine. We're not married."
	"Oh. . .?" The man raised a questioning eyebrow.
	"We just found her over there. We'd like you to try to find her mother."
	"Oh! Sure! So what's her last name?"
	Suzie looked thoughtful for a moment. "Your last name comes after your first name, right?" she
confirmed. "Well, my Uncle always called me Suzie Jacuzie.
	"Really! I like that even better than Suzie Scully! Uh, no offense, ma'am. . "
	"None taken," Scully muttered.
	"Why don't you come with me, Suzie?" As he took her towards the lost and found building, he
started making up a song about Suize Jacuzie.
	"Come on, Mulder," Scully said, pulling him towards the show.

	The show was the first attraction Scully was able to thoroughly enjoy. It was a musical that took
place in the sixties. Scully thought it copied off of "Grease" just a little too much, but it didn't turn the
audience upside-down, and she was thankful for that. Mulder, however, was very bored by the end of it.
	"They should have had more dancing girls," he said. "Come on, let's go ride something. . ."
	"Another roller coaster?" Scully groaned.
	"No. This is a different kind of ride. Come on, it's over this way!" He tugged at her hand and pulled
her over to the end of yet another mile-long waiting line. There was a sign above them labled "THE DROP".
	"What a creative name," Scully said sarcasticly. "At least it's better than 'Tornado Loop-De-Loop.'"
	The line inched ahead.
	"I can't see the ride," Scully complained.
	"Yes you can. It's right above us." Scully looked up and saw that THE DROP was simply a long,
long, LONG pole that stood atop the little building that the line was headed for. As Scully watched it, a row
of seats slowly made it's way to the top. They stood suspended for a few seconds, then plunged down.
	"Mulder, I don't want to do this. . ." Mulder was beginning to agree with her. But they found that it
was impossible to go back; the line had built up behind them and the walkway was so full of people that it
would have been impossible to take just one step backwards.
	"Looks like we're stuck," Mulder sighed.
	Eventually, they reached the building. Yet another bored teenage employee hearded them and
several other poeple into the seats. "There doesn't seem to be any shortage of them around here," Mulder
remarked. Scully was too nervous to reply. 
	Before they knew it, the seats were moving up. . . and up. . . and up. . .and then they were going
down.
	"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

.....this will be continued whenever I think of a good ending. The one I wrote in the car sucked.